The sun shines through my bedroom window. I am awake although my eyes remain closed while I take time to gather my thoughts. I don't want to open them, don't want to face the day ahead. I just want to sleep,forever. But I manage to bring myself to do it.It's the same almost everyday; my vision is temporarily blurred,my mouth and throat are dry and my body feels utterly deadbeat and lethargic.All common symptoms of poor blood glucose control. I have to go downstairs to do my bloodtest which,pretty much guaranteed, is always high and subject myself to 2 daily injections of insulin.They feel like gruelling tasks, and having to plan what I'm going to eat or whether to bring an insulin pen out with me seem so inconvenient.

I don't even remember the day I was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes mellitus.It was shortly after my second bithday.My parents have often recounted that fateful day in which I continuously threw up and eventually passed out. Apparently I didn't eat a thing all day.

I used to be really bad, I ate chocolates,sweets,cakes and very large portions at mealtimes. I knew that it was wrong to have done that but I didn't realise how it could've affected me in the long term,which might explain why I'm paying back for the poor blood sugar control then: my eyesight is nothing short of atrocious,eczema,and constant dehydration.

Often I've asked myself "Why me?" Here I am worrying about a life threatening condition whilst my friends worry about conventional things like hair or make-up.I feel like no one else seems to fully comprehend what I've been going through for the last 16 years of my life.I dream of a life where I was never diagnosed with diabetes.I dream of a genie granting me 3 wishes. If that ever happened I know I would be wish away diabetes. But then I watch T.V. and see children half my age devastated by warfare,children dying of cancer or AIDS,orphans and the like.It could be so much worse.

Now I think "Why not me?" I've had this condition for a large part of my life.Not a lot of people would know how to deal with these things which,surely, makes me all the stronger.My diabetes is now under control,I eat so much more healthily, I exercise and I feel great.I'm more aware of everything and am far less ignorant.I am thankful for having such great parents who've supported me when things haven't gone the right way and for a kind,caring and supportive medical team.I've done so many amazing things in life,which some people could only dream of doing.Yes,I can't deny that diabetes has been a bit of burden at times but it's never stopped me before and it won't stop me from achieving my dreams in the future: going to university in September and then volunteering in Peru for 2 months next summer. I wish everyone could think like that.Life's too short to dwell on the negative aspects of life so I treat everyday equally and take life as it comes.Also with the advances they're making in the diabetic field I firmly believe that you can never be too hopeful.

With regard to all my dreams in life diabetes is a part of those. Which is funny really because they're the only sweet things I'm allowed where diabetes isn't an encumbrance.