It just happens, no explanation. One minute I'm in a warm happy house, the next I'm in a blue room with fish painted on the walls, drips in both hands. My mum and dad talking to the doctors, being told that if they'd waited any longer before bringing me in I could have easily slipped into a diabetic coma. I remember that blue room. I remember getting a 'Noddy' comic and new pyjamas while I stayed in hospital, but I don't remember enough. I don't remember what it was like before then.

I was only 3 when all of that happened, can you really tell a three year old to inject themselves every day? No, so someone had to do it for me. This was generally my mum. Sometimes it wasn't so bad and I let her do it but other days I would run around the house, hiding from that needle. I remember the tears and screaming, being told that I had to have it but not understanding why.

Getting diabetes doesn't change who you are, even if I didn't have it, I seriously doubt that I would be much different to the way I am now. It doesn't make you feel a certain way. You feel all the same things as people without the condition, you can do the same things, you experience the same things. But you go through more. You see some situations through different eyes to other people, but who doesn't? Having diabetes doesn't make you an outsider; it is one of the many things that make you the unique way that you are.

I don't feel one way towards my condition. I feel many. Sometimes I hate that people want to help and try to understand. I just want to do things my way on my own but then I realise how truly stupid that is, they just want the best for me. Sometimes I feel almost grateful for having the condition because I feel it has made me more aware of how other people are feeling. I remember that I once got a booklet from the hospital when I was a little kid, and on one page it had a blank face. Above this picture it said, "Draw how having diabetes makes you feel" I recall splitting the face in half down the middle. One half had a smile; the other half was frowning sadly. People without diabetes, no matter what experiments or tests they have gone through, can't really understand how someone with the condition feels. They can study for years, talk to many patients but they will never feel the same way.

It can be hard going for my check ups at the hospital because they just tell you to do this and that and ta-da! Everything will work; but its not that easy is it? There are different factors that make each of our diabetes slightly different and so where one type of regime might work for one person, it could make another have constant hypos or highs. I can't help thinking that even though the doctors do know what they are talking about; they don't actually have to control the real thing everyday. They tell me to vary injection sites more, well I try but it hurts so much more! They tell me to change my insulin to carbohydrate ratio, we do but does it work? They tell me to switch to a different type of insulin, with all those extra hypos?

Sometimes it's weird, like now, even one and a half years into secondary school, some people in my classes don't know that I have diabetes. I'd always imagined that people could immediately tell that you had the condition, as if it said so in big neon lights flashing above your head. How wrong I was.

In August 2005, I got something really truly special. To most kids this would be a PS3, Xbox, a new computer, but for me it was an insulin pump. That meant fewer injections, more freedom when it came to food, and for once I felt more like everyone else, being able to eat without having to stop and inject myself. It makes me feel strange when I have to change the batteries on it, I once giggled to myself "I'm battery operated!" it's strange to think that without those batteries I might not be here!

I would consider myself a fairly 'normal' teenager, whatever that may be! I can do anything if I put my mind to it. I won't let my condition prevent me from doing anything I wish to do now or in later life!

No one that I have ever met has thought badly of me because of my diabetes, in fact I think that because of it people respect me more! I mean, with type 1 diabetes (what I have!) it's not as if you have any choice in whether you get it or not, you cant do anything to prevent it. So would you think badly of someone because of them having freckles, or having to wear glasses? No of course not! You can't help having diabetes any more than people can help having various other things!

However, one thing that really gets to me is when people don't see the difference between type 1 and type 2 diabetes. People who get type 2 diabetes are more likely to be overweight and older at diagnosis than those with type 1, which can have made them more likely candidates. In a citizenship lesson at school we were looking at health and why it is important that you don't become obese. When we looked at the health risks that you are more likely to have if you are obese, there were mentions of diabetes. I was so upset, people turned round to look at me and immediately assumed that I either used to be or still am (which is obvious to anyone that I'm not!!) very fat! No one understood about type 1 and type 2 and wouldn't listen when I tried to explain, they just thought I was making it up.

Thinking about people in Africa or other third world countries makes me feel bad. I can sometimes feel so stupidly sorry for myself when I really have just about everything in life. They have nothing. And when I read about the other awful diseases and conditions that some people have and will have forever, I know I should count myself lucky, things could be a lot worse. Having said that, there is still a part of me, a part that aches to be just like everyone else and I get times when I think "Why me?" but thinking those things wont help, it won't change what has happened. Nothing but a miracle can change the fact that I and many other people have this condition for now. But who knows? With stem cell research and various other tests and experiments there could be a future without diabetes, there is that glimmer of hope.

Thank you so much for taking your time to read this.